In the Before Time

To recap: Here's an index to these pages of blabbering,

that sucks, its crazy her shit isn’t that old, but i guess thats how it goes, and its something i kinda fear but also look forward to.i’ll need to sponge info, it’ll be a  big challenge. she’s lucky to have mary. I’m amazed and how giving mary is. truly a blessing. then again, filters get clogged and blowers stop, especially if you don’t maintain or overfill. I’ve dealt with reviving a few thought were dying freezers  that just needed maintenance. 

and thank you. I’ve become accustomed to vampires, whether people or bed bugs. i get lazy and forget that people are so painful and get pained. i try to let that shit roll like water off a ducks back. lately you’ve taken the blunt end of me complaining, which i need to severely curtail, because its not who i am. i did used to have a  ring of friends that shielded me from thievery and other vampirism, but they’re long gone.  which all goes to why I’ve dabbled in S&M, as those characters are shielded from outsiders to some degree, but that led to a domme that was abusive in her own way. i mean i worked hard pad all the bills bough everything and even took her to my birthday dinner with a birthday check from mt then just died mom, and she crapped on me. lesson learned. you know upon hearing stuff like this is why i think monica treats me like she does, she fails to understand i can and amcapabile of being me, although the outward me was boosted greatly by the alcoholic me of which there is no more, hence reclusiveness. anyway ,damn ‘mother novel, two chapters even lol i dat know why you put up with me, its gotta be exhausting. anyways back to my being me. toodles🤓

hey, sorry  i didn’t get back with ya sooner, i slept then got right back into my schtick, i’m so slow and wishes ashy with all this menial computing stuff I’m doing, i always take too long to decide and end up revisiting anyways, but I’m quirky and i do what i want. so i’m guinna have accumulated a pile of cash by the time i start my move. I’ve settled into the fact that Monica won’t help, so now have got to figure out a plan b and new timeline, i have a fall back plan, and thats this low income housing astute and their takeover, i can almost sleep until then, ii won’t, ill streets and i’ll put something together, it’l cost me 200 a month o keep storining the rv, but thats way better than the alternatives that all seem to be more money and want you to be covered by insurance, so its the best place, thats what i think.the hotel takeover should really be almost instantaneous, they originally said early sprint, which is mid march then recentlt told me mid january and told the lawyer as soon as tomorrow. i sure do hope they have the influence i want them to have, they could push through some of what i think its favoritism or rather a dislike these places have for the low end cuz it breed problems. ye another reason why i need a crew cut, or short hair anyway. at this point id be embarrassed if i don’t do it, so it’ll haft be by next sunday, maybe even tuesday when i go out to cram paperwork at my cardiologist so that i can get theses surgeries done, I’m supposed to get teeth yanked and be put under on wednesday so its gotta be done, head already waited since dev 5 and last time i checked last week not got one done from then, dec 5. wifi can’t be put under I’m gonna put off the surgery, i don’t want they busting my root of my teeth up on pieces and yang them out one by one while I’m listening and feeling and straining to keep my mouth open. fuck that, i want out and i guess for that I’ve gotta go phonically cram paperwork to sign at my cardiologist. did ya like that little time lapse? that was me, my every day from like age i dunno 18 to 38? right in there. i still have that bong to, its in storage, i got the bong in like the mid 90s. groovy, huh? so i moved the furniture around  little today, its way better to type this way, and i get a better tv angle i think, plus i needed an excuse to wipe the dust bunnies off the table. i also got out more computer work for me. as much as i was almost done stealing movies and filling up three 4TB drives in tandem, two started to fail, i have to two extras and I’m trying to get the data onto them before i erase and try to salvage the old ones. i’ll buys  new one, a different brand, in feb if I’m still here, then at least i’ll have one freshie for all my media, because that al it really is is al those thousands of movies shows songs and photos. I’ve got months and months to watch look at and listen to without  repeat and no wifi needed. originally it was for the commune iw as gonna buy for me and my family and friends, but when then housing market took all the equity in my house and my marriage started to crumble, that when out the windows, but my collection continued. so tom called. I’m helping him get money from the guy whose dog bit hhis kids dog. since she told me she kicked him out for a few days i went to hime and said hey since your booted temporarily, you should come over, and he had to correct the with his rendition, i know he exaggerates but he was pretty convincing. she’s fucking up, still increasing how fucked up she get and screwing off work, and pushing him away. thats life i guess.  I’m committed, i’ll stick by. anyways thats enough ear chewing. ciao